end of year blog

Are you happy?

no

are you safe?

 yes

then that's all that matters.

Love all, trust a few. Do wrong to none - William Shakespeare - "All's Well That Ends Well", Act 1 Scene 1

i know that

i never gave up.

that what i always tell myself. and sometimes i even believe it. deep down i know that im wrong. obviously.

i cannot escape from myself, no matter how hard i try.

my shadow is always following me around for some strange reason

i cant seem to stop it

i need to shut off this mind before it gets too much

i always have a problem with myself

my head.

im waiting for you

when will you arrive?

tick tock

tick tock

the thing that gets me

is that you feel the need to lie to us.
though obviously, i'm being quite oxymoronic.
which i'm not even bloody sorry for.

i'm trying not to get angry every time i see you, and that's hard.
it's so hard to believe anything you say.
and i'm against everything you have done this week.
stupid girl


lesson one for you;
you set yourself your own standards, so when men people treat you like crap, it your own fault.
not ours. dont come crying to us because i for one, have no sympathy.
he. you. everyone - deserves more
and so do i. you insulted my intelligence that day and you know i wouldnt do that to you.
i want the awkward stage to be over, but if you dont buck your stupid damn ideas up then it will never be.

i'm disappointed in both of you
(and i sound like my mother. lord)

beep.

sometimes i think you only think about yourself.
i get headaches daily - not just because of you, but sometimes.
your voice comes in and out of my ears like a fly flying by them and then going away.
i dont want you to go away
but the buzz hurts sometimes.

broadway smoke shop vs. tea leaf dreams


i dont know why but every time i form a sentence it has the word 'but' in it.
butbutbut
its like - fuck off.
my mind is messed right now. i have nothing poeticslashimportant to say.